Lazy Saturday

Saturday morning and I did not have anything urgent to do today.  I did not open my eyes until 8:30.  I looked at the clock and closed them again.  I lay under the covers enjoying the warmth and quiet.  What luxury! 

I’m trying to start a new routine: Take it easy.  Don’t rush.  At this stage of my life, I should have learned: Slow and easy and I can still get done all the things that are essential.  Since I survived breast cancer 22 years ago, every day is a bonus.  Put up with what I must put up with.  Sometimes I feel that dialysis is devouring my life.  But I still have four days a week to enjoy.   

Perhaps I dozed off again.  Charlie jumped up beside me.  I opened my eyes.  The cat looked at  me as if to say, “Don’t you know it is time to get up?”

Usually the radio starts to play at 6:45.  I force myself to get out of bed, take my pills, brush my teeth and wash my face.  Among my distractions this week were trips to the dentist and the dermatologist.  No cavities, but in spite of taking an antibiotic pill every morning and washing my face with special soap, I still get ugly spots on this aged face.  The skin doctor took a growth off my nose.  It proved benign.  

On ordinary days I dressed and go outside to go down to breakfast.  One reason I moved to this retirement community is so that I don’t have to cook or wash the pans.  I need lots of protein for my kidneys.  Monday through Friday I eat two eggs every morning.  Our kitchen staff does not cook eggs on weekends.  This morning I put on my silk robe over my nightgown and sat in my recliner drinking tea until 10 a.m. 

Finally, I reached for the control and let my electric recliner push me out of the chair.  In the next hour I did the usual morning chores – made my bed, washed the tea mugs, cleaned Charlie’s litter box and carried the result with the trash to the container outside my apartment, showered and dressed, and went downstairs for lunch. . 

As I got off the elevator, I saw Louise coming out of her apartment.  She struggled with her walker to push open the screen door.  We chatted as I held the door for her.  I moved on towards the dining room, and she called to me, “You cheered me up!”

Before I reached the dining room, I met two more old ladies.  Both greeted me with big smiles.  I thought, “I try to make life a bit more cheerful for all of us.  Maybe that’s enough to get out of life.”  

I felt really good about life and about myself until Bill Pyle sat down across from me at the dining table.  He told me at breakfast he ate one of our cook’s giant-sized home-made cinnamon rolls.  I dearly love Sal’s cinnamon rolls, and I missed the one time he made them this month!

Oh, well!  Life is full of choices, important and trivial.  In my 83 years I’ve made bad decisions, but I’ve had an interesting life.  I’ve eaten lots of great meals.  In spite of dialysis and a shaky heart, I have a good life now.   Next Saturday I’m not sure it will be worth getting up early, even to have one of Sal’s cinnamon rolls.